A little while ago, as more of a running joke, I decided to see how hard it would be to become a fitness influencer. Mostly, it was to help me stay focused and lose the last 40 pounds. Needless to say, I spent the last couple of months spinning my tires.

I have a penchant for starting over. I’ve been in week one of my 12-week fitness challenge since the beginning of the year. And no matter how motivated I get on a Sunday, I just can’t seem to get the flow going for the long haul.

Usually, it’s because I forget what I was doing. I really hate getting old.

Do I Really Expect to Become a Fitness Influencer?

The whole premise behind the fitness influencer thing is more of a joke. In fact, one of my last videos for CrossingColorado.com was poking fun at a Tik Tok trend about dry scooping.

Do I think I’ll make tons of money while traveling around with a harem? Nope. In fact, the idea of turning into one of those jock-wannabes is north of cringey for me.

No, it’s more about finding a way to keep me motivated while sharing my experiences. Hopefully, I can help as many people with their weight loss journey as I have with using Textbroker as a writer.

Why Do I Keep Starting Over?

I am a stickler when it comes to collecting data. And when something happens and I can’t collect all the numbers I want, I restart the case study.

Because that’s what a lot of me being a fitness influencer centers around. For one thing, I don’t believe in just talking out my ass about any particular topic. All of my health content is based on scientific evidence and personal case studies.

It’s hard for me to write an article about how I lost so many pounds this week when I can’t show the numbers to demonstrate progress.

Most of the time, I forget to collect the data in the first place. Then, it puts me into the “eh, let’s just start again next week” frame of mind. And thus continues the week-one cycle.

I’m afraid I might have to be one of those people who has to schedule every single moment of his life just so he remembers to do certain things.

Do I Really Have the Time?

There’s no doubt that in any given week, I have an awful lot to do. Luckily, my friend, Chris Desatoff, has been helping out with some of the video and podcast stuff.

Still, on paper, I have plenty of time to get back into health and fitness. In fact, it’s part of rebuilding CrossingColorado.com.

The last couple of weeks, though, I think I’ve been teetering on the verge of burnout. My motivation is sapped and I am constantly tired. More so than I’ve felt since before moving to Los Angeles in 2016.

I think I am stressing about the wrong things, to be honest.

But in reality, I should be able to handle everything without too much of an issue.

How Can I Get the Passion Back?

When I started my weight loss journey, I was all in. I would track everything in MyFitnessPal and freak out if the numbers ever went red for caloric intake. Nowadays, I just don’t seem to care as much.

I want to figure out how I can get that passion for progress back. It’s starting to affect a lot of different aspects of my life, actually.

At the moment, the only thing I truly get excited about is when I do the live streams on Mondays and Fridays. Maybe that’s my mind’s way of telling me I need to be more social.

Perhaps getting out of the damn house once in a while for more than shopping would do me some good.

I’m trying some new supplements for the next couple of weeks. It’s my hope that I’ll get back on track, sleep better, and have clarity of mind. Either way, these supplements are going to give me a blog post and perhaps a video.

Regardless, I need to find something that works. Even if I have to scrape enough up to see a doctor. I’m just so freakin’ tired all the time.

Still Going to Give it a Try

After changing the way I set up creating weekly content, I am getting back into some habits for health and fitness. Just not all of them.

I’m going to give it another try starting today. I just hope that I find some way to get back that ambition to succeed. Hopefully, in a couple of weeks, I’ll be able to write about how this new supplement changed my life.

But, the skeptic in me is always wary of any kind of supplement. So, we’ll have to see. According to the chemical composition of the supplements, though, it does have a basis for working.